Stress Eating

I don’t know about you but when I am feeling down I tend to stress eat. Mac N Cheese, Ice Cream by the gallon and a trolley of candy. I have noticed lately that these food do nothing for me. At the moment they taste good but the aftermath is unpleasant. I go from being down to also having a stomach ache, not to mention I stay bloated for days. I have done some research on the topic and found some foods that help when you are feeling blue.

·         Eggs or an Omelet - Rich in B vitamins, B vitamins can help lessen the severity of depression symptoms according to care.com

·         Seeds and Nuts - Perfect timing with Halloween just around the corner. Magnesium, a mineral found naturally in nuts and seeds, influences production of serotonin, a "feel-good" brain chemical.

·         Fish - Omega - 3 fatty acids, omega-3 fatty acid DHA, which has been shown to increase the membrane quality and nerve function of gray matter in the brain

·         Green Tea - L-theanine is an amino acid found mainly in tea leaves which can improve focus while also having a calming effect on the body.

·         Blueberries - rich in antioxidants

·         Chocolate - Studies suggest that chocolate in moderation, does actually make you feel better.

·         Turkey - relatively higher levels of a chemical called tryptophan (amino acids)

Here are some recipes for you to enjoy!

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About me and why I started blogging

Hi, my name is Alice. This is about my journey down the rabbit hole known as depression. After realizing that I am not alone and that other people feel the exact same way I feel, I have finally made the decision to start blogging. Hopefully, if nothing else, my blog will inspire and help others struggling with depression, anxiety and other emotional issues.  I am not a doctor. I am writing this blog for my own good and again hopefully I can help others get through some tough times.

I struggle with depression and anxiety. My family is not aware of this, just my husband and myself. For a long time I was in denial. I did not want to see any kind of doctor and I was sure that this was just a phase. I was not sure how to address the issue so I ignored it, until it finally took over. I finally broke, with tears streaming down my face, I called out of work...again. This was the turning point for my husband and myself, I knew that I needed to change or this would consume and ruin my life.

Before I get started just a little background. I have always struggled with making decisions and telling people what and how I am feeling. Recently, I have discovered more people who are struggling and then it clicked. I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE. What a relief, I know that depression is a real issue but because I didn't have thoughts of suicide I figured that for some reason I was ungrateful for the life I have or that I should not feel so selfish. This should not be the case. Even a little depressed is still depressed. For those of you out there that are looking for support or an outlet, please follow my blog. My posts will focus on the positive, the negative and the emotional side of this. I will post things that have helped myself and others get through the days one step at a time. Not everyone will relate to this but I encourage your feedback and comments.

Sincerely,
Alice

Sometimes the best thing is change

Okay so let me address what I said before. Yes, I was in tears each day before my shift started. I have no idea why and it would just hit me. I would get up and either I would feel fine until I reached the car or I would start feeling anxiety hit me first thing when my alarm went off. I would try and talk myself into going to work but could not stop crying. I had no reason to feel the way I did. I have a great life and I know it, so why was I feeling this way?

Then the stress hits. I found myself wondering if this feeling would ever go away. If this was stress or depression or was I just lazy? I could not wrap my mind around what was going on. My work life was miserable. My boss was really mean and condescending to me. Every day I had to hold it together and fight back my tears. The only thing that made me feel better was my understanding husband. He would tell me that this feeling was okay, hold me and let me cry. I would sit there and google more reasons to call in…again so that I could take the day to calm my nerves.

I truly believe that you should not judge a book by its cover. My boss hated the fact that I was taking time off and did not understand what I was going through. This invisible pain is torturing my mind, how do you even explain that to someone? Then there was the random triggers, I could not even enjoy my weekends without the stress and anxiety. Even my dogs knew I was struggling and would not leave my side.

I could not find my happiness so after many long discussions and careful planning I quit my job. My boss did not take it well. She was very concerned that she would not be able to take a vacation and that her job would not consist of covering all that I did. This made me feel horrible but I had to do what was best for me. I advised my boss that, for personal health reasons I would be turning in my two week notice. She kept pressing and asking questions like "well, do you have cancer, or a brain tumor?" she did not understand why I did not want to talk with her about what I  was going through. She could not understand what was preventing me from continuing to work there. Well I called out the following Monday and was told that I no longer needed to come in for the remainder of my notice. That was a nice break. I did get another job since we had bills to pay. I took less pay and am now working less hours but I already feel a little better. Sometimes the best thing for you is change.

Gratitude

This is an off topic for this blog but with all that is going on and all that I have been through I just had to post. Sometimes what you need is a friend. My husband has helped me get through each day with the support and love that I needed. He has been understanding and patient. We are the absolute best of friends and I love that I have the rest of our lives to spend with each other.

We started off young and unsure if this would work out but to our surprise it did! There has always been something special about him that draw me closer, I want to know everything that I can about this man. We have both grown together in the same direction. We both think alike and respect each other.

We have also NEVER gone to bed without kissing good night. Through it all we have had each other's back and this is what has helped me get through. When I am going through the darkest of times it is him that remembers to turn on the lights.

Stats

When you feel like you are alone just remember there are more fish struggling to breathe just like me and you. Thank you Huffington Post for these easy go to stats . . .

350,000,000 The number of people globally who are affected by some form of depression.

11% the percentage of adolescents who have a depressive disorder by the age of 18.

70% the percentage by which women are more likely than men to experience depression in their lifetime.

16,000,000 The estimated number of U.S. adults who had at least one major depressive episode 2012. This made up approximately 6.9 percent of all adults in the country.

14% the percentage of women from a 2013 postpartum depression study who had the disorder four to six weeks after giving birth.

30% the number of college students who reported feeling depressed, which disrupted their ability to function in school.

$80,000,000,000 the estimated annual cost of depression in the U.S. due to lost productivity and health care.

8,000,000 The number of ambulatory care visits from a 2010 CDC report where a major depressive disorder was the primary diagnosis.

50% the percentage of Americans with major depression who don't seek treatment for the mental illness.

10% the estimated number of American adults age 65 and older who have a diagnosable depressive disorder.

10 – 20 the number of weeks psychotherapy treatments for depression usually lasts (though it varies depending on the condition). In order for antidepressants to take full effect, experts recommend giving the medication four to six weeks. Find out more about the different type of depression therapies from The Huffington Post through the link below.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/01/20/depression-statistics_n_6480412.html

Stop Stressing and Smile

Today, I thought that I would write about the things that help me de-stress and get through tough days. These things may or may not work for you but you won't know until you try.

Snag a hug from a friend or loved one. Sometimes the best feeling when you are down is a good strong hug.

Go for a walk. If you happen to have pets then this is a great place to start. Take them for a walk they will thank you and your mind will have time to wonder about other things you thought you didn’t have time for. If you do not have any pets go for a walk by yourself, the alone time will bring you peace. Side note if you do not have any pets I defiantly recommend rescuing one or two. They bring so much joy and happiness into a home and act as your emotional support.

Talk about it. This is a hard one for me. When I was feeling down the last thing that I wanted to do was to talk about it. I thought that if I talked about it then I would bring others down or be judged. What I found instead is that I for one am not alone. I also found that talking about it to someone you are close with or someone who might understand what you are going through takes a lot of weight off of your shoulders. It actually feels good to let it out and stop bottling it inside.

Go explore your town. Specifically look for sites that you have never seen or been to before. This just puts the world on a scale. It shows how small the little things are.

Sing and dance. Put a song on in the morning and shake it in the mirror. There is nothing better than being suddenly inspired by an inspirational song. I will attach a list of some of my favorites at the bottom.

Fake a smile. This one is said a lot but I have found this to be one of the easiest and hardest to do. Easy because well it's easy to make your face smile. Hard because at the moment when all you want to do is cry the last thing on your mind is smiling. Try it anyways, then try it again. Try to perfect your smile until it makes you giggle a little about all the silly faces your end up making.

Last but not least take some selfies! This sounds way off right?! When I am feeling down nothing seems to go my way. I personally struggle with confidence. I feel like there are so many beautiful women out there and I am not one of them. Well that kind of thinking does no good so turn it around. Yes, there will always be someone prettier, better looking, smarter and funnier than you. That is just how it goes. That does not mean that you are not beautiful. Try to find the beauty within and take some selfies. Do some cute poses, make silly face, and dress up. This will help boost your confidence when you find that perfect picture to post on Facebook.

I hope you enjoyed today's post, please feel free to leave comments, suggestions and questions.

As promised here is a list of the songs that lift me up, feel free to add them to your play list.

Fight song - Rachel Platten

Roar - Katy Perry

Bad Reputation - Joan Jett (Thank you Rowdy for bringing back this inspiration)

Survivor - Destinys Child

Stronger - Kelly Clarkson
Who Says - Salema Gomez

Let it be - Beatles

Here Comes the Sun - Beatles

I Feel Good - James Brown

 Try - Colbie Caillat

Always Look on the Bright Side - Monty Python

Beautiful - Christina Aguilera

It's My Life - Bon Jovi

Don't Stop Believing - Journey

Perfect Day - Hoku

How Do I Feel - Hoku

Three Little Birds - Bob Marley

Jammin - Bob Marley

Don't Worry Be Happy - Bobby McFerrin

The Tide is High - Blondie

What Dreams Are Made Of - Hillary Duff

Why Not - Hillary Duff

On an Evening in Roma - Dean Martin

Anything Eminem or Britney Spears brings me up here are a few

Not Afraid - Eminem

Lose Yourself - Eminem

I Need a Doctor - Eminem

Piece of Me - Britney Spears

Everytime - Britney Spears

If you seek Amy - Britney Spears

Stronger - Britney Spears

If vs. When

When I am feeling down my mind starts to run. When my mind starts to run I start thinking about all the things that I am stressed about. Life, work, money, etc. Things that may not be that big of a deal seem like now feel like a battle. Like your mission is to defeat the armies of Sauron and Sarumon as their evil spreads across the lands of man. If you don't understand that reference I recommend reading or listening or watching The Lord of the Rings. As I have mentioned before reading is a great way to clear your mind and get lost. 

When we are stressed a lot of times we play our scenarios in our heads like what if my check is low since I took those days off and what if I can't pay this bill. Time to change this way of thinking, change the if to when. This may seem off but hear me out. When my check is low and I am unable to pay this next bill . . . now fill in the rest. Take action! When my check is low and I am unable to pay this next bill I will call the billing provider, explain the situation and ask for a payment plan. This will not always work but it helps to put things in perspective and not on a pedestal. This seemed like a bigger issue when all these 'IF' statements run through my mind but when I take control and knock them back down I feel better. Not only has a weight been lifted, I now have a plan, I wont be taken by surprise if no WHEN my check is low and I have defeated the armies in my head. 

The point is that when you are feeling this way it seems to really weigh down on you. Try not to let it. Easier said than done, I know but take a step back, take a deep breathe and try to move forward. Things generally are not as bad as they seem. You can do this, it is not a matter of if but a matter of when.

**Again I am not a doctor or therapist these are my personal thoughts and what I do to clear my mind. These are some steps I take to conquer my depression, if you suffer from depression I recommend seeking professional help.

Here are 15 more ideas on how to clear your mind.

Here are 15 more ideas on how to clear your mind.

Take your mind off of today and think about tomorrow. Does your mind ever run a million thoughts go through your mind and they wont stop! This is not something that is everyone's style but it certainly helps me and I hope these help you too. Please leave questions and comments.

1.       Create a list of things that you are grateful for, review this when you are feeling down for that extra encouragement

2.       Find a craft or DIY project on pinterest that you like, start and finish it

3.       Clean and/or organize your house (as boring as that seems, de-cluttering your house can help you feel at peace with your home)

4.       Write in your journal/diary/blog or in my case start your E-book

5.       Read or sit back and listen to an audio book

6.       Workout out and get addicted to it (again this doesn’t sound like fun but when I do my Yoga daily I feel great)

7.       Find 5 Facebook friends and compliment them (this can be anything and being nice always helps me calm my mind)

8.       Cuss out loud (sometimes if you scream F*it, it makes you giggle and a happy you is the goal)

9.       Get all gussied up and take selfies (this can help your confidence as well as clear your mind)

10.   Write down the things that are running through your mind then one by one set them on fire (write each item on a separate sheet of paper)

11.   Snuggle a puppy (If you do not have one I recommend you go down to your local shelter and adopt one, if you are able and capable of caring for a pet)

12.   Learn something new (google something that you have always wondered about IE what year was Harry Potter born, you can also start typing then select something from the drop downs) 

13.   Find a park and go enjoy

14.   Walk through a cemetery then plan your own future gravestone (I know dark, right?! The goal is that this will turn out silly and get you thinking, I do not intend this to get dark)

15.   Take a long luxurious bubble bath (good for guys and girls)

**Please be safe. If you intend to set stuff on fire then please do so in a controlled area like a fire place and use caution.

Sex and Stress

I have noticed that when I am feeling down I don’t want to do much of anything. I just want the day to be over with. So what can you do now? How about SEX?! When you are feeling down sex may be the last thing on your mind but it should be your first thing. Having (safe) sex helps reduce stress and anxiety. Sex is like exercising your mind, body and spirit and we all know that "exercising gives you endorphin's, endorphin's make you happy, happy people just don’t shoot their husbands" (The great Reese Witherspoon in Legally Blonde). I'm challenging you! The next time you are feeling down practice safe sex! Do it over and over again on a regular basis.

Still not convinced? Here are some additional benefits of having sex:

Boosts your immune system

Lowers blood pressure

Improves Sleep

Improved heart health

Puts you in a better mood

Reduces stress

Sex helps tone your body

Why wouldn’t you?!

*If you followed my earlier posts I have researched and tested the benefits of Marijuana to help when you are feeling stressed. If you are feeling a little overwhelmed today try all the above. Put on your favorite tunes to set the mood, take a hit and have sex. I can personally vow that this has helped reduce my stress immensely.

Please comment and/or send me your feedback I would love to hear your stories. Also if this worked for you, let's hear it!

Also, I am not a doctor again these are things that I have tested myself and feel that this has helped me. This blog is meant for responsible adults I am not encouraging teens to act upon this.